Willpower- or NOT?

I'm pretty sure there are very few (if any) overweight people that get up in the morning, look in the mirror and say, "Wow I am SO happy that I'm carrying around this excess weight! It's so nice to become out of breath when leaning over to tie my shoes. I am really looking forward to spending hours in the changing room today to find an outfit for work that disguises how truly large I am, and I will look forward to paying more money at a larger-sizes store, since my size can't be purchased in mainstream stores. In fact I love how I look and it's no big deal that my cholesterol and blood pressure are high, I'm pre-diabetic, I can't keep up with my kids and my life expectancy is reduced because of my size. I embrace my dietary habits and never feel one bit guilty anytime I eat more food than anyone else at the table. I LOVE being me, just the way I am!"

I subscribe to a page on facebook called: I See Fit People. It is a very inspiring and supportive community of people (of every level of fitness) who share the common goal of aspiring to living healthier, and achieving an improved level of fitness. It was founded by Wendy, and she has two co-admins, Matt and Rachelle. (Consider "liking" the page-you won't be disappointed!)

The admins like to keep the page interactive, so often a question of the day is tossed out there to get a discussion going.


"Wendy's Question of the Day: How do you maintain the willpower?"

There were many responses. One in particular caught my attention:
"Willpower is a myth. there is nothing super natural or mystical about living healthy. No one needs willpower to pay bills, to brush their teeth, go to work etc. It is what you DO to live healthy. It is a choice and you live it.Willpower gives it a separate power that it should not have--like giving yourself permission to cop out..oh I lost the willpower etc. It is like when people refer to it as 'the weight' it is not 'the weight' you have to lose it is just added body fat that you need to use up. Nothing about any of this is as unreachable as people WANT it to be when they feel lazy. Get over it."

I felt compelled to respond:
"Well I for one, struggle with it and apparently based on well-publicized statistics, I'm not the only one. I guess some may choose to view that as weak and lazy (which is often how we overweight- okay- overfat people are viewed by those of you in a "normal" BMI range). Yes it is about choices. I guess some people are better at making good ones and sticking to them than other people are. But everyone has a story and it's not always about looking for excuses. Some people inherently have more challenges and more obstacles than others. And not everyone has the same level of education, or determination. It's not right or wrong it just is what it is. Success (in anything) comes from many factors that have to be lined up just right. The mental, the physical and the emotional readiness have to be synchronized. So those of you who have it all figured out please be patient with those of us who are still working on lining it all up. Each choice we make takes the power of our will to choose properly. Including whether to pay our bills, brush our teeth or go to work. Ya. Willpower. It does exist. It is required. Anyone who uses the lack of it "as an excuse" just isn't ready yet. (They also have no right to whine if they are not working on it). Some may have forgotten what it was like to be where they are, or if you are very fortunate maybe you've never been there. I can only hope that someday when I'm not here anymore I will remember the struggle for 2 reasons: so I'll never go back there, AND so I'll be patient and non-judgmental toward those who are still there. ♥ ;-)"

I must add that I have a pet peeve concerning people who make judgement calls that imply they are above others and have all the answers. I certainly hope I don't do that. In fact I try not to. I'm not saying I never judge people. I am human, but I strive to catch myself in the process, and make myself take a look at all the angles and possibilities rather than zoom in on one point of view. I guess it's the old cognitive therapy classes I took years ago that have stuck with me, thankfully.

I do understand, however, that when we become enthusiastic about something that helped us succeed, it is much easier to lose sight of other options, opinions, or theories that do not coincide with, or support our "cause." It becomes very natural for us, in our enthusiasm and based on our personal success, to judge and perhaps criticize others who do not share our views or follow the same path. We need to keep in mind that every problem usually has more than one solution, and what works for one person may not work for another. Something that one person may find easy or natural and straightforward may be a struggle for someone else. In fact something that is easy and straightforward for someone may not be so for that same person at another time, depending on other coinciding factors and circumstances.

Yes, we are responsible for our choices and should be making ones that lead us toward our goals not away from them. I do like her reference to "using up added body fat" vs. losing weight (which, unfortunately tends to get found later), and using up sounds like more of a deliberate act rather than losing, which seems inadvertent. 

As much as I am fortunate enough to have the knowledge and education to know what my appropriate choices are, I still struggle to follow through on them, because there are other factors in play besides just knowing wrong from right. I do not  want to forget these feelings as I move beyond them and leave them behind. I humbly hope that when it's my turn for success, I can be humble and hopeful for the success of others who will be struggling, as I am now.